You can find good advice in the weirdest places. For instance I found the best advice for my current situation on Pinterest. The advice was in the form of a quote by none other than Doctor Seuss. The quote stated, “Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”
This quote is by no means saying to disrespect people with words- I see it could be taken that way. In my case I took it to mean that not everyone will love me. And that is A-Okay! I can still be the happy person I am in spite of how certain people may feel about me. But what I took most to heart is that the people who love me in spite of my imperfections- because we all have flaws- are the people worth your attention, time and efforts.
It is possible that one could do the best at everything and people would still have bad feelings for whatever their reasons. That said person would work themselves silly to please everyone and would in turn feel sad when said people did not value them or their extreme efforts.
In my case I have people (my support system) building up my character enough to know that even though I am awkward and imperfect I am good enough.
In closing- my piece of advice is to surround yourself with more joy and positive vibes than that which brings you down and you will find that you end up not caring what the nae-sayers think of you!
Happiness is a choice. I have bi-polar so I know sadness is a reality to but more than anything you choose how you look at each day you face. Easy enough to say choose to be happy right? It is.
If a professor only looks at the bored pupils in class he is going to feel as if he is a failure as a teacher. If he chooses to watch the faces on the interested students he is going to feel good about his teaching abilities. The same goes with your mood and how you face each day. I will tell you a personal story about me to explain why I am choosing to be happy in spite of my obstacles.
I have a wonderful fiancé. Stephen is loving, funny, and sweet. He cheers me up when I feel sad and loves me despite my flaws. Yes I too have flaws. Stephen has a very mean dad who treats me with distaste. I am a good person and to have someone treat me as such boils my blood.
Stephen proposed November 26th 2016. The happiest night of my life-so far! His parents both have voiced what a terrible thing it is that we are doing to his family by getting married. They are also taking his house which he has rented for 6 years. Now this is all a bit much. Right?
This all being said you have to be able to look at the good things:
- Stephen loves me in the rare once in a lifetime kind of way that sometimes people never find.
- My parents LOVE him!!! And I care what they think.
- My sister who hates pretty much any guy I every dated… Loves him!
- My extended family- on both sides love him.
- And lastly and most important of all- I love Stephen the most I have ever loved someone. He is my end all be all and more than anything in life I want to make a life with him and grow old and wrinkly with him!
So what if his parents are mean. I chose to look at all the wonderful things I have going for me. Happiness is always a choice sometimes you just have to choose joy even though it may be easier to give in the latter.
The thing I would be most ashamed for people to know about me is that I have mental illness. I am not ashamed because there is anything wrong with me- I am ashamed because I know how people react to the stigma of it.
I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, Anxiety, and Bi-Polar Disorder. In other words I have crazy good attention to detail; I am a touch hyper, a bit socially awkward, and moody. But I am lucky. I have a job where I work with sensitive information and it pays that I can be extremely careful with numbers, I have a fiancé who loves the energy I have and who nurtures my strengths. And I am blessed to have parents who are understanding and want the best for me.
The stigma that says a person with mental illness is lesser is mistaken. They are just uniquely gifted in ways that not everybody can understand. And to the employers out there, most people with deficits are more eager to prove that they are a valuable asset. And to the people out there who have mental illness and think they are unable to meet someone that will love them: there is someone for everyone. You might just have to look a bit harder and be more selective. Mental illness is not the terrible thing society makes it out to be, it’s just another one of life’s many obstacles that make life interesting.